I am lying in the little coye of the night train from Bangkok to Surat Thani. This is my third night without sleep. I am lying awake and my eyes don’t want to do me the favor to close themselves.
Since today I did not know why I couldn’t sleep at all, but perhaps I found the answer now in this little corner of the train taking me to some beautiful place in the world.
I am on my trip to visit Thailand. The different culture is very interesting and I get so many impressions during these days, I can’t hardly work them all out.
Traveling expands the horizon and I am sure to learn a lot from these people living on the other side of the earth. I always wanted to travel and the last three and a half years, I did spend all my money and free time to fly to beautiful places.
Getting to know other countries gave me a good feeling and I did not mind being far away. It was even better than being at home because I didn’t like it there anymore.
Things have changed a bit and since I moved into another apartment, I do feel much more comfortable now.
Do you want to know what I found out today? I did not see it myself but now it it seems clearer than ever to me:
I am not traveling, I am searching home.
It’s like my workout in the morning when I go out running. I did not begin to run for running and having a good workout, I began to run away from everything I was not satisfied anymore. And that was much.
Now I am traveling. I’m on my way to find home again.
Home, the most beautiful place on Earth although there are neither lovely mountains nor the beautiful sea.
Home, the place you settle down.
Home, the place which gives you the feeling of having arrived with all of your soul.
Home, the place you are when you are far away.
Home, the place I do not have to sleep alone all week.
I haven’t finally found it yet, but I am on my way…
…and it seems to me that my eyes do not allow myself wasting time by sleeping at night.